Thursday 25 June 2015

A weighty issue

I have been unhappy with my weight for a long time now. After the birth of my son nearly 8 and a half years ago, I naturally carried extra weight. But I really struggled to lose it. I hated being bigger. I would look in the mirror and not recognise myself. I felt uncomfortable in my own skin. And I started to feel that once I lost the weight, everything would be alright. I would be happy and all my problems would go away, and if they didn't, I would at least look better. I felt like this for a long time. It was awful.

Then, a few years ago, I joined Weight Watchers Online. I started counting points and eating less, and I finally started to lose weight. It was actually pretty easy. I ate lots of salads, started exercising a little and it felt great. The thing was though, I was still drinking my nightly wine. And I still lost weight. I lost around 8kg and got down to 60kg. I still wanted to lose more, but it was a great start. And it wasn't even that hard. I was rapt!

Then I got a little slack and didn't count points anymore. I ate less salads, maybe I was drinking a little more, I can't really remember. But the weight gradually started to come back on and now, a couple of years later, I am even heavier than I was before I started counting points and trying to lose weight.

I haven't had a drink for 39 days, and I haven't lost any weight!!! This is so frustrating! To give you an example of the point system, I was allowed 29 points a day. I could eat whatever I wanted to, as long as I stuck to 29 points. You also get 49 bonus points a week, which I would go way over all the time. Now, a whole bottle of wine was around 20 points. So you can see why drinking makes you put on weight! But what I don't get is how I lost the weight in the beginning even though I was drinking? And now that I'm not drinking, why isn't the weight falling off me?!

I know I eat too much chocolate, but not a whole bottle of wine's worth a day! Is it because I'm getting older? Has my metabolism gone awol? Why why why?!

I know it's silly, but I hate being overweight. I'm not huge, but I'd love to lose 15kg. Even 10 I'd be happy with for now. I don't like myself like this. I'm not happy.

Does anyone else have this problem? Not losing weight even though you are no longer drinking? Does it just take time?

I have drunk less this year than I have for years and years, I just don't understand why I'm not losing weight. It is so damned frustrating.

Sorry for the rant. Just had to get it off my chest!

A x

23 comments:

  1. I'm the same age as you and have struggled with my weight as well over the last 20 years. It started when I started working in IT. Long days sitting at a desk and nights on call with interrupted sleep piled on pounds. I stopped drinking 9 months ago, and I lost a few pounds (like 3 or 4) the first month or so, but I also was counting my food calories during that time and was exercising. Then something happened after the first month where I decided I was going to eat whatever I wanted. Dammit, if I couldn't have wine, I was going to enjoy food! I gained back the few pounds I lost at first. What I have learned is that at this age, weight does not just fall off anymore. You have to watch the calories you eat, and try to get 10,000 steps every single day. My fitbit says I only burn about 1600 calories in a day if I don't exercise. That assumes a fairly sedentary day. That means to lose a pound a week, I would have to restrict my calories to 1100 a day, which is very difficult. That's where lots of exercise comes in. If I want to eat more than 1100 calories a day, I have to exercise. Generally if I get in 10,000 steps, I can up my calorie intake to about 1400-1500 and still lose about a pound a week. The best thing I can recommend is to use a tracking site like Sparkpeople or myfitnesspal to log your food every day and log your exercise. Or if you want to splurge, get yourself a fitbit. I have the one with the HR monitor, and I really like it. It has really gotten me motivated, and it comes with great tools for tracking your food too. The bottom line is that losing weight is about calories in vs. calories out. If you're not losing weight, it's because you're taking in as many calories as you're burning. Unless of course you have a legit metabolic condition, but usually if you really start measuring and tracking what you eat, you can see what's really going on. I've dropped 8 lbs in the last 7 weeks, but I've had to walk a lot and stay on top of my food intake. Sorry I don't have a better answer. It does suck to be a woman at 47 in this respect. Your metabolism just goes south.

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  2. Thanks for your tips, very helpful. I am starting to get back into exercise. Last week I did 2 days and this week I've done 3 days so far. I have DVD's I do at home. I can't afford the gym and the home workouts are pretty good. I just have to make sure I do them!
    Yes, I'm finding it's much harder to lose weight now that I'm older. When I was younger, all I had to do was do a few workouts, not eat as much and the weight would fall off. Wish it was still like that!!
    I had my thyroid checked because i was convinced my thyroid was underactive but it was fine (which is a good thing) Guess it's just old age and maybe hormones?
    Anyway, will persevere. I know not eating chocolate is a good start!
    You are doing really well, with your weight loss and sobriety. Well done!
    A x

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  3. Hi, yes it sucks not losing weight esp if you have given up drink. I have lost over 25lbs twice after i had my kids, it was just baby weight as it was 9 months after they born, i was just a bit fat!

    i did a high protein low fat low card sensible eating diet. (motivation diet, not sure if its in Oz?) it was easy enuf. I was still drinking and i still lost the weight slow and steady, it just came off when i ate less. i think it is more about food than anything else. Do a weekly weigh in some where, there is nothing like it for motivation. I haven't drank in a few week and am exactly the same weight if not a bit heavier. I am slim enuf but if i eat more than i need i go up a few lbs pretty quick. I don't care what anyone says its all about the food you eat!

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    Replies
    1. Hi Kats, I was paying for weight watchers online but I wasn't doing it (just paying their wages!!) It was supposed to be a weekly weigh in, but I didn't do it. It was all too hard in the end. And because it was only me doing it I didn't have to answer to anyone, I think that was the problem. I put the My Fitness Pal app on my iphone but i haven't really looked at it yet. Maybe I should start counting calories?
      You did so well to lose 25lbs!!
      A x

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    2. yes, i was super focused and enjoyed the process. I know we need to love ourselves but carrying extra weigh is just no enjoyable. I agree with Anne though (as always) one thing at a time!! After summer, get a weekly weighin class and work with someone you like and trust

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  4. thats supposed to be 'not just baby weight'

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  5. I gained about 15 lbs year ago. As soon as I hit 40 it became extremely difficult, almost impossible to lose weight. Our metabolism slows down significantly. I use fitbit to track my steps. I also started running a little bit. But while drinking, I was gaining weight. Slowly but steadily. Right now I cut out all snacks during. I am trying to stay away from sugar. And I try not to overeat. Cut out chocolate for sure and get walking. 10000 is not that easy to get. It is about 5 miles.

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    Replies
    1. I think that's what happened to me. I got older and my metabolism slowed and the drinking weight just caught up with me. It's just frustrating that I'm not losing even a tiny bit now I'm not drinking!
      I'm hoping that now I'm getting back into my exercise, I will feel motivated to eat better. A x

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  6. I lost about 20 lb when I quit drinking but since then 10 lbs has crept back on and I've been binging on sugar for four years now. I've been back on the Atkins diet for a week now and have lost 9 lb eating all I want of protein and very few carbs. It may not be the healthiest diet out there, although they do offer a healthier regemin called the Atkins 40, but it works and the thing is, I feel so much better once those carbs are out of my system. My energy level is great and I no longer have that sluggish, sleepy feeling I'd started to suffer after every time I ate. The first few days were hard, and I felt like crap, almost like alcohol withdrawl, but since Day 4, I've felt wonderful

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    Replies
    1. Hi Kary, I find it hard to eat low carbs! How do you do it?! I have heard of the Atkins diet but don't know much about it. Is it hard?
      It's been years, so long I can't remember in fact, when I last had energy. I just want to feel well! A x

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  7. Most people expect to lose weight and don't. Perhaps we were replacing. Food with booze? Hmmmm.
    Now you eat alittl more.

    Focus on what me thing at a time. Any sort of restriction is triggering in early sobriety. Dieting esp finally.

    Let it go. I found I had a lot of work to do on finding even a bit of self acceptance and compassion. Part time f that the as learning to love myself regardless of my size.

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    Replies
    1. I suspect you are right. I shouldn't be worrying too much about this, not at the moment anyway. I should concentrate on one thing at a time. And at this that should be my sobriety.
      I guess I just thought that I would be feeling physically better now that I'm not drinking. It's so frustrating!!
      A x

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    2. It is. But healing takes time. It will happen.

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  8. Sorry, my iPads acting crazy. Part of that was leaning to love myself. To not crucial myself. To be comfortable as I am today, not thinner or fitter or richer, etc.

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    1. I need to do that too. Learn to love myself. I've had self esteem issues all my life and I'm over it. Hopefully now that I'm drinking I will find out who I am.

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    2. Go back to Brene Brown's the gifts of imperfection. It is amazing.

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  9. Angie,
    As a person who has been up and down in my weight over the years, I understand.
    At first, I did not lose weight when I stopped drinking, and even then, I only lost 5 pounds.
    Can you focus on feeling strong, not thin? That helped me.
    xo
    Wendy

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    Replies
    1. Hi Wendy,
      Yes, I should stop focusing on getting thin. It's not the end of the world to carry a little extra weight.
      I just don't feel comfortable this way. Sigh.
      Day 40 today and that is all that matters.
      A x

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  10. Hi Angie! I'm the same age and the pounds have piled on! It sucks! This time when I quit drinking (4 days ago) I decided to go on a diet as well. I know it may not be good to do both but I think they compliment each other. Can't be healthy while drinking and I can't be healthy eating what I want (chocolate) to replace the alcohol. So I read a great book called Grain Brain and it's about more than weight loss, but also for desease and brain function. So I'm following his diet, which is low carb high good fats and some protien. No sugar. Since I love avocados and other good fats, it is very satisfying. It's also helped with bloating and after day three, I'm not hungry between meals. I have a fit bit (love) and I use my Fitness Pal to track calories and percentages of carbs, protein and fat. The keto diet is very similar. So when I want a glass of wine I think of all that work I would undo. And when I want chips and chocolate, I think about how it would ruin the no drinking that I have managed. Sorry, that was so long, but I'll let you know how it goes. Hope you find the answer for you. It's soooo frustrating thinking about how many calories you are saving not drinking. Should be more than enough!!! Take care!

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    1. Tread carefully. You are putting a lot of pressure on yourself. Quitting drinking is a hard thing. Adding restrictions makes it harder.
      Not drinking is not just about health, it is about self acceptance and mental stability. Don't let the dieting conceal that.

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    2. Thanks Anne and yes, I'm working on that part too, with my therapist.

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    3. Hi Nic,
      Well done on day 4. Yes, be careful. Like Anne said, it is a lot of pressure to put on yourself.
      Maybe I should check out that book you mentioned? Sounds good. Good luck. Hopefully today you are on day 5.
      A x

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  11. I did weight watchers too earlier this year and lost a stone even though I was still drinking, it's amazing how we can manage the points system so wine is still included. Maybe it is your metabolism or maybe your not eating enough to make up for the loss if wine if that makes sense. You should try following the points again this time with just food.

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