So, I had a break through last night.
We were having dinner and chatting when I casually mentioned to hubby that I was considering doing Dry July again but that I wasn't sure. I said I wouldn't be drinking anyway, but that I wasn't sure whether to do it or not. Hubby then suggests that I do it unofficially, that I just do my own challenge. So I told him that, actually, I was already doing my own challenge, 100 days in fact. And I mentioned 'some girl on the internet' was running it (sorry Belle, you are much more than some girl on the internet! I just wanted to keep it low key) What day are you up to? asks hubby. And I say 24. So there you have it. It's out in the open, albeit not in great depth but it's still out there.
Also, I decided to go to Kmart last night because the little guy needed a costume for his excursion today and I wanted to see if they had what I needed. So I say to hubby "it's good not drinking because you can drive to the shops at night". To which he replied something about that being what normal people do. I was a bit pissed off for a second but then I thought, no, you're right. So I said as much. Because it's true. It is what normal people do. And as much as I tried to talk myself into the fact that a lot of people drink a bottle of wine a night, they just don't. News flash - normal people don't drink a bottle of wine every night! Which of course, deep down I knew. I just didn't want to admit it. There's no hiding anymore.
I had the little guy home sick again yesterday and I was reading all my sober blogs plus new ones that aren't on my blog list. One of them had the word 'alcoholic' in big letters in the title. Well, little guy saw it and was trying to read it. 'Catholic?' he asked me. What are you reading about 'Catholics' for mum? It's not Catholic I say it's.... and I changed the subject. Because I wasn't sure if I wanted to explain what an alcoholic is. I have casually mentioned before that if you have too many beers or wines it can change your behaviour, but I haven't gone into it further. My brother who drinks way too much looks terrible most of the time. I asked the little guy once if he noticed anything different about his uncle, but he hasn't. He just said he smokes too much. So I left it at that. But if I want him to grow up aware that drinking too much is bad for you, should I explain to him what an alcoholic is? Is he too young (8 and a half) to know? I don't know. Any thoughts on the matter would be appreciated.
So, day 25 today. Feeling pretty good. Still tired but not as bad. I think I have been sleeping better since I started taking magnesium so that's a good thing. I'm still waiting for my pink cloud though, hopefully that will come!
Have a great day everyone :)