Thank you SO much everyone for your support yesterday. It really helped me. It was so lovely knowing that you were all out there thinking of me and cheering me on. I held you all close to my chest and felt cocooned and safe. That evil voice didn't stand a chance!
I ended up sending a text to my friend C telling her that I was on my way but not to pour me a drink as I was on the AF stuff that night. When I got to her place she had the bottle of bubbly on the table with a few glasses and I wondered if she'd gotten my text. No, she hadn't seen it yet. So of course when I said I wasn't having any she was all 'no way! Really?!' But she didn't push it, for which I was grateful. Another girl had half a glass and they were the only ones drinking. I could see C wanted someone to drink with, but this time it was not going to be me!
At the restaurant, I ordered a diet coke and water. C had bought along another bottle of bubbly. She asked me if I was sure I wouldn't like one, then proceeded to ask the others if they would have one with her. I felt a bit sorry for her, because I could see she was desperate to share it and not be the only one drinking it. But that wasn't my problem. I really like her and we are becoming close friends, but I will not be coerced into drinking. I will have to have a chat to her soon and tell her a bit more because I don't want to go through that every time we catch up.
It's going to be hard, because I LOVE bubbly, sparkling, champagne - whatever you want to call it. But I can never have just one glass. Two of the ladies at dinner last night had one glass of shiraz with their steak. Just one!! Who does that?! So as much as I love bubbly, it's not for me anymore.
I feel tired still but so glad I didn't wake up with a hangover. The little guy is off school today (teachers are doing reports or something) so it's lovely to be fully here with him. Not hungover and miserable and everything being too hard. So we are going to go on the bus and the train into the city and look at all the Christmas windows in the shops and have McDonald's for lunch, a bit of an adventure. Last year I planned to do the same thing but I woke up so hungover that I couldn't get out of bed till late morning, told the little guy that I was sick and we spent the whole day at home. Not this year!!
I am quite stressed about Christmas. I find it all overwhelming. The cleaning of the house to put up the tree, putting up the tree, all the Christmas shopping when funds are tight, figuring out what to get everyone etc. But I hope looking at all the Christmas decorations and things in the city will help me to get into the spirit. Christmas is a magical time and I want to be happy! Which I will be, soon.
So my friends, I'm feeling positive. I CAN do this. It might be the most festive time of year, but if I can get through this period wine free I can do anything!!
A x
Beautiful job.
ReplyDeleteIt is hard when we have drinking friends. I always want to make others comfortable. But you out yourself first. Perfect.
Take Christmas slow. Don't try to do it all at once.
Tomorrow sounds lovely (today)? With your son. Those days make it all worthwhile.
I know what you mean Anne. I almost said sorry to C for not sharing the bubbly with her, or maybe I did, either way, we shouldn't have to apologise or feel guilty for not drinking with friends. It's their problem not ours. I do intend to take Christmas slow. It will be interesting to see how it unfolds with all the family together. Family politics and all that. Day 11 is drawing to a close so I'm off to bed soon. A x
DeleteYay! that's awesome! Doesn't it feel wonderful - hangover free in the morning! And ready for a great day xxx
ReplyDeleteYes WB, it felt wonderful waking up without a hangover! I wonder how my friend pulled up this morning?! And we had a great day too. A x
DeleteWell done Angie, in some ways it is a good time to stop, as you say yourself, if you can do this you can do anything!! X
ReplyDeleteYou are so right Kats. If I can do this I will be invincible!! But seriously, I will try my hardest to do this no matter how difficult things may get, A x
DeleteWell done for getting through the evening and not drinking, and next time a similar situation arises you'll be able to take strength from having survived a similar situation before. With these sort of social occasions, I find that the beginning of the evening, or even the anticipation of it is hardest, but once it gets to 9ish I no longer feel the envy. 😊 X
ReplyDeleteThanks Silver Birch, you're right about the anticipation is hard. The thoughts that go through your mind before are crazy! Hopefully it will get easier as time goes on. A x
DeleteYay for you!! So glad you had a great evening and resisted the bubbly. Sounds like a wonderful day with your son!
ReplyDeleteThanks DobieGirl, it was a lovely day yesterday. So nice to be fully present for him. A x
DeleteSo so proud of you! I never can have one glass. You kidding me. :) It is difficult to go out with drinking friends. I've been there before. And I will be there again a week from now. Oh well... I will keep reminding myself about you and how you did it and I can do it too!
ReplyDeleteYou can do it too Time. You just have to be strong. It's hard at this time of year though. I sometimes wonder if I'm crazy doing it now! But then I have to remind myself that there will always be something on, so I have to just do it. Good luck with your night out. A x
DeleteOMG you did good! That really is a shame, your friend wanted someone to drink with so badly. In a way, that's probably good for her since most of us (pre-sobriety) would not BAT AN EYE at drinking alone. NOT A PROB, GALS! But, not your problem and yes, I think you should tell her and get that cleared up.
ReplyDeleteI know. I see how much she drinks and wonder if it's a problem. I don't think she drinks as much as I did but that doesn't mean anything. She says it relaxes her. I don't think she is anywhere near thinking she should stop. And maybe she doesn't need to. I don't know. Maybe she will see me not drinking and see that it can be done. A x
DeleteHi Angie!
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry I missed your post, but I can see now!
You did good!
I am so glad you can be 100% for your son.
Christmas can drive me nuts, too.
Do what you can, and don't worry if you can't do everything!
xo
Wendy
HI Wendy, I'm so glad your op went well! I find Christmas quite stressful. Well, the lead up to it anyway. I love the actual day when everything is organised and you can enjoy the day. I hope I can do it without the wine. I really do. A x
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