Friday 17 July 2015

My almost meeting

So yesterday I was going to go to my first AA meeting. I had it all worked out. I found a meeting in the city at 12.30pm. A bit of a pain to have to go on the train into the city, but at least I won't know anyone there and I can do some window shopping. Before I had the little guy I used to love shopping in the city.

So I drive to the train station, park my car and head up to the platform. I had my met card ready and I could here the train coming. I was on time for once and not having to rush!

But then I realised that I had left something at home (medication for my endo) What to do?! So I considered not worrying about it and still going. After all, I had gotten this far I should keep going. But no, I turned around and went home to get the meds I'd left behind. And of course I now wouldn't make it in time so I had to give it a miss.

And now I'll never know if I would have gone to the meeting if I'd gotten on that train.

I am disappointed in myself. I'm not sure if I used an excuse not to go or if I really would have gone. Guess I'll never know. But I WILL go one day, soon.

Mum is coming to today to stay for a few days. This always stresses me out. But I suspect it is because I am usually drinking wine every night and trying not to notice mums disapproving eye. Plus, hangovers always make me short tempered and impatient, so that's probably another reason. This time, I won't be drinking so it will be interesting to see if I get less stressed. I'm pretty sure it's a given! But sometimes mum just rubs me up the wrong way, so we'll see what happens. I will let you know! I probably won't get the chance to come on here much but I'll do my best to pop in and read my favourite blogs.

We went late night shopping last night and had a bite to eat at the same time. Usually I would be impatient to get home so I can open the wine and get stuck into it. No such problems last night! At one point, hubby took the little guy to the toilet so I sat down to rest my feet and wait for them. To pass the time I hopped on my phone to see if there were any new blog posts to read and came across SoberMummy's. When I read about Jane Green's new book being about a woman who has a drinking problem I was so excited. I love Jane Green and have most of her books. So I went to Big W and looked for it but it didn't look like they had it. But then I saw it in the new release section. And it had a bonus second book so I got them both for $16. I was rapt! I would often get 2 bottles of wine for that price, so it was a good feeling knowing that I would have something to show for my money. I started reading it last night and am enjoying it already. It's a nice change from the more serious sober memoirs I've been reading of late.

Anyway, I'd better go and straighten up a bit. Mum should be here soon and I have to at least make the beds!

A x

8 comments:

  1. Things will work out eventually. Meetings are an interesting experience. I think everyone should try one. Just to see.

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    1. I would really like to try one. I will look into it again when mum goes back home. I will never know other wise and will always wonder. Ax

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  2. i think it is ok to be disappointed you did not go but hey at least you are not disappointed you drank! That would be way worse. I am sure you will go to a meeting when you are ready X

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    1. Very true Kats! It definitely could be worse. I will hopefully get there one day. A x

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  3. Hi Angie,
    I will have to look up that book!
    Let us know if you like it!
    Being around my mom is always a little bit hard.
    I think mother/daughter relationships are hard at times.
    So happy you are keeping on your sober path!!
    xo
    Wendy

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    1. Hi Wendy, yes you are right. Mother/daughter relationships can be very complex. But mum won't always be here so I should make more of an effort. A x

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  4. Ahh mums. Can't live with them, can't live with them...You're right they can be very complex and stressful but I'm sure it'll be much easier without the drink involved. I'm deffo going to get that book, I'll read it on my holiers...! You're doing a great job!x

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    1. Thanks Mtts,
      I still get a bit impatient with mum (which is my problem not hers. She doesn't actually do anything wrong, just things she says and does annoy me sometimes) but it is a lot easier without having wine on board and being hungover and miserable all the time. A x

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