So, back to day 1. I know I have had quite a few. But I can't worry about that right now. I just know that I have to start again and that means being back at day 1.
It's amazing how you can get to 25 days without alcohol and then undo it all in just a few days. It is so easy to get into the mindset of 'oh bugger it! I've stuffed up now, so may as well keep going'. But I'm not going to do that. Those 25 days without alcohol were awesome. It was 25 days that I didn't pour poison down my throat or have hangovers or shame or guilt. Sure, I may have stuffed up, but I have learnt from that. So here I am again.
I went out for dinner last night with some of the mums from school. There were six of us. Three of us had 2 glasses of wine and the other three just had water. No one questioned it. No one had to explain themselves. Well, one of them is pregnant so that's an obvious reason, but the other two just didn't drink. I did think of just having water too, but unfortunately I didn't. It was a lovely evening though, and thankfully, having wine didn't spoil anything.
But then I came home and had a few more glasses. And I decided that I'd had enough. I don't want to do this anymore. So I tipped the rest of the bottle down the sink (there was a little less than half a bottle left) I woke up tired and a bit seedy this morning. Little guy has been sick with a cold so I kept him home again today and we are having a quiet day. I don't want to feel like this again. Thankfully I haven't got a raging hangover, but I do have that tired feeling that only happens when you've had alcohol the night before. That not quite right feeling that is like no other. But NO MORE! I don't want to feel like this ever again!
I'm even thinking about signing up for the 100 day challenge. The thought of 100 days scared me but I think I need to do this.