Dinner with friends. And my new addiction!

Day 47. Feeling a bit tired to day. It's because I stayed up till about 1.30am!! The reason for that is the little guy has been struggling to go to sleep on time and staying awake until well after 10, and even 11pm which, was the case last night. And because it's the school holidays you don't worry so much,, but it means that it's pretty late by the time he's asleep. So when I finally sit down to watch my show on tv (currently it's a show called Nashville. It's BRILLIANT!! It's on Netflix if you're interested) it's really late. Then OH will go to bed at around midnight or after so it's even later before I get a chance to check out my blogs. I know I should just go to bed after my show finishes, but hey! I've always been a bit of a night owl. Not drinking doesn't seem to be changing that!

Last night we went out to dinner with my friend C, her OH and their little guy. We had a lovely evening. They saw my diet coke and asked me if I'm still off the booze, and when I said yes they didn't mention it again. They had a few drinks over the course of the evening and we had a great time. It didn't bother me at all that I wasn't drinking. If I ever think a glass of wine would be nice I just remind myself what would aqually happen after having that 'glass' of wine. Because we all know that it's never just 'a' glass of wine. And playing it forward seems to be working for me. It takes the romance of that glass away. I need to constantly remind myself that I can no longer have a glass of wine. That I'm not a normal drinker and never will be. And I think it's slowly beginning to sink in.

I have a new addiction though. Although it's not really new. It's chocolate!! I just don't have an off switch! I made some chocolate chip chocolate muffins yesterday and straight away I ate 4 of them!!! (They are actually cupcake size though so I tried to convince myself it wasn't so bad. Actual muffins are much bigger) And by the end of the day I'd had 6 all together! (blushes with embarrassment!) Why can't I enjoy just one and then stop? Like 'normal' people? And soon I'll start to think it'll be better when they're all gone so I can't eat them any more which will give me a perfectly good reason to finish the rest of them! And then I will complain about my weight! It's so frustrating!  Any suggestions?

It was interesting at dinner last night. My friend C was talking about wanting to cut down on her drinking, about how easy it is to drink a bottle of wine a night. I wanted to tell her that I have some great books she could borrow, but I didn't. Because even though she sometimes talks about cutting down, she also says how drinking 'relaxes' her and I don't think she's anywhere near admitting she has a drinking problem (and she may not. I could just be making an assumption here). Still, I hope she sees me not drinking and still having a good time and learns something from it. Maybe one day I will tell her I have some great books she can read when she's ready. We'll see...

I'm off to the shops with the little guy today. I want to try and get a pedicure so my toes are nice and summer ready for my operation (because having painted toenails when you are lying on the operating table is essential!) I've decided to get the shellac polish because they will last for the rest of the school holidays (of which there are only about 3 weeks left!!) Also, it's a little treat for myself for getting to 47 days sober. I forget to give myself treats, so I thought I may as well start today.

Have a great day everyone :)

A x