Thursday 9 April 2015

Tired but sober

Gosh I am tired! I just wish I could sleep! I know from my last sober attempts that it takes me a while to start sleeping better. That for the first week I have very interrupted sleep and waking up exhausted. I tried to nap this morning but my mind seemed to be going a million miles an hour and it was impossible. Having the little guy home didn't help either because without the remnants of alcohol on board I felt guilty not being up for him. I have wasted so much time drinking and being too hungover the next day to not do anything constructive. My poor son. He has missed out on so much :(

So I've been awake since 7am and have yet to do anything other than browse facebook and sober blogs. I have managed to get a couple of loads of washing done so at least that's something. But I just don't have the energy for much else. I'm hoping that once I start sleeping better I will be able to get more done around the house and start doing some exercise. I need to start feeling useful. I only work part-time and am starting to feel guilty now that little guy is in grade 3 and I didn't have my much yearned for second baby to keep me busy.

Anyway, my thoughts are all over the place today. I want to start blogging more because I think that would help but I just can't concentrate today. So, I'm off to finish the washing and at least try and get something useful done!

A x




4 comments:

  1. This too shall pass. Take this as a good sign, your brain and cells are getting rid of all that toxic $#it and recovering. Listen to it, rest, treat yourself kindly. Wait for the miracle. (I love that saying even though I'm not a member of AA) Usually, by day 10 I was feeling like I could slay dragons.

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    1. Wait for the miracle...I like that. I really must stay strong and not give in. Wait for that miracle. I'm not used to treating myself kindly, maybe it's time to start? A x

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  2. Yes, that tiredness lasts a long time. The body takes a while to heal and it is a reminder to be gentle with ourselves.
    Your son is lucky! He will have a sober and present mother today. Leave the pst where it is. Finished.

    Take it easy. Rome wasn't built in a day. Sobriety is partly the act of learning patience!

    Anne

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    1. It's depressing to know that this tiredness will last a long time. But it will pass. I just have to stay strong and not give in. I feel marginally better today so that's good. I'm going to hold onto the fact that I will one day feel so much better. And you're right, I need to learn patience! A x

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